All posts by linda

Life Challenges

Changing your “NOW what?” into a “What NOW?”

Have you ever asked those two questions? “NOW WHAT?” is usually after something has gone wrong and there is a high level of frustration. The “What now?” question can be asked when you realize one thing didn’t work or perhaps just looking for the next task to tackle. Here are three ways to deal with those questions.

Basically, there are three simple steps and it begins with recognizing what you don’t want as it helps to clarify and distill down what is actually desired. My experience has been that most people tend to focus on three main area: lose weight, improve relationships of some kind, or to increase financial standing. Therefore, by first giving some attention to what you do not want, you can drill down by asking “what to I want” , then “WHY?” The why is truly the answer that one is seeking.

It helps to realize that everything is energy – – everything! And it all vibrates. Some at a low, slow speed, and some at a faster, higher speed, but know that everything around us vibrates, which means there is an energy source involved. You can actually attract the reality that you want by drawing it to you, giving it focus, attention and energy. That which you give attention to – expands, what you give energy to – grows, and what you focus on manifests. This is the basic law of attraction and how it operates in every moment of every day!

Think about the vibes that you pick up from other people, you can tell if they are happy, sad, worried, nervous, angry, etc. You also are sending out vibes to the people around you and they pick up on them as well. These are what most of us refer to as just ‘feelings’, but know that you can choose your feelings just as easily as you can pick out which shirt you are going to wear in the morning.

There is a definite relationship between the words that we use and the results that we are experiencing in our lives. The words that come out of our mouth, actually formed first in our brain as a thought, where EVERYTHING was first designed and imaged. So words spoken, often determine our feelings which are vibrations, and the result is then observed.

One way to change this is to be aware of the negative influences in our speech patterns, and by eliminating six words, replacing them with alternatives impacts what we see and experience. Those words are: don’t, not, no, can’t (a cousin of don’t), but (see what happens when replaced with ‘and’), try (Yoda’s immortal words “there is no try”). Challenge yourself to be aware of these in your speech and replace with more positive sounding words. Maybe look for a list to compose and keep in your pocket.

You may be asking how to shift your vibrations other than replacing words. A simple, but not simplistic, method is to acknowledge them, that is be aware. Awareness is the first step to change of any kind.

Next, look for evidence or proof of what it is that you are wanting instead, which is a clarifying step. For instance, I want to take a trip. Do other people find cheap ticket deals? Of course, they do. I want to change jobs and geographical location, do other people find jobs that they like in different cities? YES. Therefore, if I give attention to job searching, focus and imagine myself there, being grateful for the many opportunities that I find, it IS going to happen.

The last step was just mentioned above. Being grateful. Say it out loud. Write it. Breathe it. Hum it. Just be filled with gratitude for all the good things that are on their way to you right now!

Life Challenges

The Process of Waiting

So many times we find ourselves at a point of waiting for someone or for an appointment, or for something to happen in our lives. It can be as simple as standing in line at the bank or sitting at the dr. office, or it can be larger such as for graduation or a wedding. Sometimes the wait is just for things to change in our lives, to have a better this or that, to achieve some pinnacle of success. And what do we do while we are waiting? How is this time or period of time used – or wasted? Is there a fervent wish to be in another place or doing a different activity?

There are those who spend the time fretting about the future, as if that is going to make it happen sooner, or the results turn out differently. And there are those who are as calm as a Buddhist Monk quietly sitting and contemplating what is around him. How could the time be spent more productively? Because as we all know, time is our only non-renewable resource, there is a certain amount given every day to each and every one of us, how we use our time is entirely up to us.
Some things that could be done while waiting are quite simple, some would require more involvement and attention. And a few of those things are thrust upon us, regardless. For instance, while sitting at a Dr. office recently, the occasion of another’s phone conversation from BOTH sides was easily shared with everyone in the room. There was nothing earth shattering in that conversation, more of an annoyance than anything. On another occasion, while standing in the bank, everyone was treated to the sounds of a game played on a cell phone by one totally engrossed patron who was oblivious to the fact that not everyone enjoyed the sounds of car crashes or electronic loser down-scale notes.

Everyone finds that there are times when waiting is inevitable. Yet, if we plan for it, there can be a profitable reward in it. One suggestion is to always have a book or an e-reader with you so that there is never down time. Another is to always have a pad of paper and a pen so that great ideas can be jotted down, snippets of a story to tell, or even just the observations of those around you. It is a matter of being aware.

Awareness is the beginning of change. What ARE the people around you doing? What DO things actually look like that you see every day? Are there details that you might have overlooked and not noticed before?

Waiting is a process, just like life, and both seem to have been easier in the past. Yet, we all have to wait at some point for some reason. There is a definite beginning (which we all can recognize), a middle (which is generally grumbled about), and an end (which is rejoiced or exalted). A process – a period of time in which one thing is accomplished or completed. Sounds like it might be life, right? Ask yourself, how are you enjoying the process of waiting? How could it be different or better?
Observe it and be aware that there will come an end.

Life Challenges

Relocation Joys

Moving is such an interesting  event in one’s life.  And transitioning is even more of a phenomenon when looked at retrospectively.  By deciding to move off the island of Guam, and Not having major funding to do so, I am in the process of jettisoning most of my possessions, and deciding what to keep, what to take, what to pack, etc.  Sorting, tossing, deciding… oh, those decisions!  So many of them and seemingly all at once.  Do I really need this?  Am I ever going to read this book/magazine/notes again? Do I like wearing this? Would someone else benefit from this?  Do I sell these and if so, how much should I charge?

Upon moving one box today, I found a couple notebooks that I had been looking for and was delightedly surprised that they were unearthed.  I remembered carrying them and writing thoughts, plans, ideas, notes in them. It was like finding old friends and being rejoined for an afternoon tea, of sorts.  Journals of daily life at a time when I began the transitions – yes, there has been more than one- and it is a chronicle of where I have been and how I have changed.  In some ways more than a little, yet there are some words that could have been written today.  Such is the consistency of our beings, our true natures.

It began with leaving the United States for a position as an ESL (English as a Second Language) in South Korea.  No, I didn’t know anything about the country, the language, the customs, or the landscape.  I did know that I had a job that I hated, a life that wasn’t fun and generally was miserable.  So off to Barnes and Nobel I went to buy a travel and language book about the country that I thought was only going to be for one year.  I took a notebook with me and began to record my thoughts, impressions, desires and observations.  Sadly, I was not as diligent then as I am now about writing.

Later, when I had tiem I began to peruse them and reread my words from long ago.  I found peoples names and emails, even phone numbers (long since discarded, I’m sure), whom I had run into and exchanged pleasantries or was in an ‘orientation’ class upon arriving at the regional training for foreign teachers.  Some of these people I remember, and some of the notes, I can remember where I was and recreate the energy of the moment when I wrote them. Interesting how our minds work!

I had begun to study a phenomenon about shifing paradigms and delved into it with a hunger that kept me wanting more.  There were things about me that I began to notice with startling revelation.  Words came back to me that were said many years before and some that were not so distant in the past. Rereading the notebooks made be think about who I WAS and who I have become. How truly intriguing to see what has taken place and now … I am remembering comments different people have said to me in the past about ‘how brave I was’ or that I was funny, or worse  how negative I was, yet at the same time being told that I was  a good listener and always willing to help out another who was in need or hurting.

When hearing those comments, I would think “I’m not brave – I just did what I had to do to survive”.  Actually, I was afraid! And I didn’t realize how deep that fear was until I chose to join a running club in Seoul (a city of 11 million people and a subway system that was, at the time only a maze of colored lines representing a map).  These folks followed little marks and ran through the town, jumped on and off the subway, ran up mountains, climbed over walls or trees, and then managed to straggle down and back to the safe place.  It was on one of those mountains, when a friend said come over here and take this picture with me, that I shook my head because my heart was shaking with fear.  I was lost and had no idea how to get back, and I might fall off the mountain, at least that was my thought at the time!

I did get back safely, and on the same day, too!

Miscellaneous

Asking Questions

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We all ask questions and recently I wrote an article about keep asking questions. How important is it to ask simple questions of ourselves? My belief is that it clarifies confusion and leads to answers, which then become the impetus for more questions. As I have said before, it is more important to be in the question, than always knowing the answers, or what is perceived to be the answer to a problem.

Here are some starters: What is is going to take to create my dream? Or, to achieve abundance? Or, to make life fun? Or, to have a phenomenal, rewarding life, etc. One would then have to be able to define what the dream entailed, or what ‘abundance’ looks like to that person. And a fun, rewarding, or phenomenal life is probably not the same to every person.

Often we pick up beliefs or sayings, sometimes they are left-over emotions from past situations which have continued to linger on with us. We can ask: “Who does this belong to?” when we realize that it no longer serves us to hold onto limiting beliefs or past wounds, regrets, or grudges. By identifying the origin and owner, it is easier to let it go, and move on with life, knowing that by dropping that burden life itself gets easier.
Along with the previous question, asking self (which is the subconscious mind): How did I create this? Where was this (thing or thought) picked up? Again, identifying the beginning assists in recognizing it for what it is, then releasing it to go back or just to disappear.

HOW can I change this? What if I did everything possible to change? What if it was easy? The last one is particularly important, because we have a tendency to put off what is perceived to be difficult or unpleasant. Why not just tackle it head on and be done with it? Or is it easier to deal with the discomfort because that is what has become comfortable?

Change can come in the from of just doing something simple by changing your angle of perception. “What is RIGHT about this that I’m not getting?” “What is the message, lesson or gift in this situation, circumstance, etc?” (And there always is on of the three, no matter what conflict is being dealt with at that moment in time!)

I particularly like the question of: What else is possible? What is to gain? How does it get better than this? (My all time favorite question!) Because by asking that last one, it opens the possibilities to a realm not realized previously and allows for more to come in as an abundant blessing!